"Let us hold tightly without wavering to the hope we affirm, for God can be trusted to keep his promise." (Hebrews 10:23)
Sometimes I still have doubts and worries, but this verse helps to squash my fears and trust in God and His promise.
Over Christmas break I was not feeling like myself. I was feeling sick and tired and couldn't figure out why. I decided to take a pregnancy test on January 1st (the day we got home from visiting our families). To our surprise, it was positive! We didn't tell anyone about it because we wanted to wait for our first ultrasound.
Fast forward a couple weeks to the weekend of January 19th. I began having some complications (cramping and bleeding). I went to the doctor to get some blood work done on Friday but wouldn't find out the results until Monday. I also had a scheduled ultrasound Monday to see what was going on. That weekend was one of the most emotionally difficult few days of my life. I spent most of it crying out to God. I believe that Friday was when I wrote my last post. I spent time praying but mostly grieving for the loss of a child I never knew but desperately longed to know.
Chris and I went to the doctor Monday morning when I was expecting to hear some bad news. I was desperately trying to be content with whatever happened, but I had a little inkling of hope that things might work out. The nurse previously told me that if my hormone levels weren't high enough, they wouldn't perform the ultrasound. Luckily my hormone levels were very high.
The ultrasound began, and to our surprise, we saw a baby with a heartbeat! Chris and I looked at each other in shock and awe. Shouldn't I have expected God to do something amazing?! I didn't trust Him, yet He was faithful to us despite our doubt and unbelief in His promises. I felt God tell me that I needed to trust in Him and His promises. Whenever I feel that sense of worry or doubt, I try to trust and remember in God's promise for our family.
I am currently 23 weeks pregnant and am due on August 24th. We're doing great and he is progressing well. He's already an active little boy. I'm looking forward to having some time to get our home prepared for the arrival of our little guy throughout the summer. Though part of the pregnancy has been difficult, I wouldn't change it. It has caused me to be grateful for the everything that goes along with pregnancy: the weight gain, the aches and pains, the sickness, the baby's movement, the constant trips to the bathroom, etc.
We can't wait to meet our little boy and begin growing our family! We hope you'll join us in praying that we will raise our child to love the Lord and trust in Him at all times. We pray that we will be Godly examples that constantly show Jesus's love.
"May all that I am praise the Lord. May I never forget the good things He does for me." (Psalm 103:2)
